I wish I wrote more in this, I really do

because no matter what my parents say or do, I still long to be a journalist.  Not exactly a fashion journalist per se though it would be quite thrilling, but more likely to be in magazine or the Times' Fashion/Style, the Arts, or Dining section.  I really like eating and though I'm not sure my palette is sophisticated enough to be a critic just yet, it could happen....right?  Or just some job that allows me to eat out often on someone else's tab while also maintaining a good looking weight. Hence this blog about various things.
Etiquette. Something I love and adore.  Though my cousin once described me as "classy but chumpy", in which I wholeheartedly agree, there are times where you must bust out one or the other.  Though I can't say I have read countless etiquette books or even touched any of Emily Post's writings, I have read enough material to generally know some odd tidbits on how things should be.  The most recent, a fairly new book by Derek Blasberg entitled Classy: Be a Lady, not a Tramp is a somewhat fun presentation of some very basic manner rules with many colorful pictures/illustrations that make it fun for the little ones.  Apparently the book is aimed towards the modern day teenager but in my opinion, what teenager wants to know about etiquette?  Aside from me of course.  And at that I would scarcely call it etiquette.  Though some parts (however, very few) parts made me laugh out loud, many were just your stereotypical gay male sayings and frankly, stupid similes/metaphors that made no sense whatsoever, trying to fashion himself as if he were Chelsea Handler (To take inspiration from his voice: Trust me honey, you ain't).  Which, by the way, I have read Are you there Vodka, it's me Chelsea since the last time I blogged about her and I am also currently reading My Horizontal Life: a Collection of One-Night Stands.  Terrific.  Though I read her books in reverse order, the order I like them in is probably in which they were written, though all are stunning.  As typical, I digress.  Blasberg's statements many times come off as "know-it-all"esque, as if females didn't know that thongs above the pantline are utterly vulgar.  Though some may not realize I guess, but then again they are most likely hoochie mamas that shop at Cache.  His book is name-dropping in the manner of a teenager girl-- he mentions countless times about how he is such close friends with so-and-so and went to a ______ themed party with ya-di-yada; it's absolutely exhausting! I had no idea who Derek was coming into this aside from the fact that he moved from the Midwest to the Big Apple as he mentioned, say, every five pages.  Not sure how it was relevant.  Coming into the book I asked for manners tips, not your autobiography.
Though I should've been tipped off by the title, I actually expected more basic etiquette rules to be in there, or rather more scenarios such as Kate Spade did in her book.  Though he mentions things such as place settings and throwing a gathering, there was a lot of Don't do this if you want to be classy and the Classy vs. Trashy comparison, something not very hard to decipher.  Upon ending the book, I basically assumed he was some random social climber just waiting to actually be famous.  I wondered how he was able to sign on to write this book and of course, googled him.
Revelation moment---what?  He's an editor at V magazine, Harper's Bazaar, and style.com?!! This isn't for real (automatically gain remote sense of respect).  So odd, I thought...and so young! This gives hope for me of course, after all, he is only from the Midwest...and with a Bachelor's in journalism only.  I was planning to get a Masters; theoretically I would go to NYU for the bachelor's (where you are forced to double major if pursuing journalism) and then I would go to Columbia for graduate school.  Aka have better odds than him.  I'm personable, it could happen!
So screw the book/personality, thank you Derek Blasberg for giving a gal hope.  I would recommend your book to others anyways so regardless of my semi-harsh criticism, at least you tried to make a difference with the younger set and for that, I commend you.

Picnic in the Park

Today, me and friends trekked to our local waterfront for an outdoor picnic with a view.  Potentially take a dip in the fountains even if the weather pertains.  WRONG.  The weather did not comply by any means and actually even sprinkled a bit, aka fuck our lives.  It turned out fine though and was good fun because of the company.  Screw the girl that decided on the date though because it's been sunny for the last two weeks.  Anywho, what is the ideal picnic outfit?  A gingham dress to match the gingham blanket you're sitting on?  Or rather, that frolicking through the field frock?  Perhaps something on the in-between, not too flowy and ethereal but not too retro cutesy.  Let us observe.
Number 1 staple- the ideal picnic basket.  It should be wicker or woven, and lined for that matter (with your own cloth or sewn on).  If it's not, throw it out! It's not worthy of eating with.  If you're feeling extra romantic, you'll have the kind of basket with the wine bottle holder(s), which is cool looking but a little clunky/inconvenient.  If it were me...My ideal would probably be woven with only one wine bottle holder (though it'd look awfully unsymmetrical) because amongst a pair or few people, how much alcohol do you really need during the day, right?  And if not, that's what flasks are for...because I would know being well under 21 and such).  I was just shopping recently and came along a perfect basket at Kate Spade.  Known for the kitschy designs and conservative but colorful New York persona, they have everything a Charlotte York could ever want.  And this includes a designer picnic basket, one that also attaches to your cruiser Schwinn bicycle, or if you're lucky, your Hermes/Chanel/Gucci one.

Alas, it's here

Grey Gardens and Bobby! Hurrah.  and 5 days until the traveling Lion King Broadway show.  Could I be anymore excited?  Why yes, yes I could actually, but I think once I get out of my sulking state and embrace my (cheaper) semi- once in a lifetime chance then I will be! However, the question is, what to wear?  As I simply googled "what to wear to a broadway show", two eHow links showed up as the first results.  No, I will not trust some anonymous, straight male who takes time out of his life to tell others what to wear via a cheapie website.  The third result was a bit more credible, luckily.  From Glamour.com, this video shows a fun makeover of one of the tourists looking to go see a show.  As I read the comments on the website, the (I assume to be) women spoke about how they got dressed up tfor their shows and felt overdressed; another spoke from the stage's perspectives and said that the cast liked when the audience dressed up.  As I consulted my cousin, Mama O, on what she would wear, she replied to me, "Nothing too dressy but more than casual; perhaps a babydoll top?"  Hmm, perhaps a babydoll top, I thought to myself.   I don't own any babydoll tops, though I really should because my midsection is freakishly large.
And as I continue this blog post a day later, I still feel the same way and I'm ready to pick up my holds from the library already! Though berry picking on someone's tab is quite fantastic, it just doesn't seem to bring me the same amount of joy that shopping/dressing up does.  Well it really depends on the situation because berry picking in a flowy dress is nice to say the least.  Though my "frolic through a field of flowers" ideal frock hasn't been completed yet, this dress will have to suffice in the meantime.  But as for a show, what is dubbed as apropriado?  Should I wear this dress that I got on sale from Urban outfitters that hasn't had a chance to leave my closet yet or even be rid of its tag?  It's a thicker cotton (I'm too lazy to search up what the material is actually called) with a V in the  back that could be interchangeably be put to the front for a plunging neckline.  There's a high neckline if you're wearing it the correct way and shoulder pads with square silver studs on top, one little guy hanging loose but nothing that can't be fixed.  It has cropped 3/4 sleeves and there is a waistline where the skirted part begins which bounces up a bit.  I really need to learn some more technical lingo around here if I'm going to be a budding seamstress/clothing designer!  If only I could get that sewing machine fixed...Tomorrow   I love the thing to death, but it shows my bra bulge roll, which is why I must get a belt.  Though I have a perfect pair of "ferosh" heels, my feet are starting to dangerously outgrow them.  Though how often does a girl wear heels, right?  I can handle it though  really prefer not to.  But they're edgy, strappy, black patent, and have silver zippers going down the middle.  This means I must have a wide black belt, potentially patent, to go with it (aka 2 birds 1 stone-- hide the roll, cinch the waist, look good).  But I feel like the theatre is a place for more traditional dressy dressing, can the Lion King handle (especially on July 4th) a girl with studs and zippers?  Especially downtown?  The world may never even see Kimberly Q in that dress at the rate she's eating at.
Would you dress up for a show?